Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

White Wizard Cast the most powerful Spell he has in his Bag of tricks>>The famos 4F spell!And Says the magic words OOOH FIND them ,feel them ,f--k them and forget them!!And it is So!

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Spellcast more BUDD! That last one was huge.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

The trolls aren't moving!

I take advantage of their inactivity to deliver further punishing blows, coming at them super hard from behind!

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Fee fii fooh fum I smell beer and Bubbelgum !So if you have Don't have any Rum Iwill put you all into My Tum Tum!With that the sumter troll swuged his his club putting everyone on the run!!

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

If nothing else at least this is better than what Willy the Clown is rambling on about!!! Would you just get off your Soap Box allready !!!!

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Tracy Meade /

I attempt to cast "landsquids" on sparta undertrolls.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

no groms no blasters /

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

no groms no blasters /

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Moped Game Sally Struthers /

distracted by the glowing youtubes, a bear appears and draws the trolls in with his siren song.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

yea what's going on, i feel like we been in this damn cave forever.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Tracy Meade /

Sparta's 56k modem must be down. He has trouble communicating with his undertrolls. I might have unleashed a powerful spell unnecessarily. I bless the legendary trollslayers of yore for answering my call and bury my chocolate coins to appease the "olden ones". It seems these trolls may be holograms, or flashbacks from the hippy bombs. Mostly harmless.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

White Wizard Cast the Spell of bad Spelling on the Under twobbs(Hey it's working!)Da undub twobbs git so confezzed da dey kilt ech udder !

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Hercules Rockefeller /

The last of the band of merry Lordsquids, Sir Een enters the cave. "Hey guys, I just got here." Gives a solid "bro nod" to fellow Lordsquids and others in the cave. Sir Een hasn't seen many of these mighty warriors in some time and wonders if they are still friend, or mayhaps foe.

Waits behind other brothren the Lordsquids for direction, when a sudden wave of energy is pushed out the portal from whence the others came. A latent spell still ringing from the Tavern, the Biebertrance. Sir Een is powerless against it, hopes to block the spell and avoid madness.

DM?

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Suddenly a bubbling sound resonates softly from below. It's frothy gurgling sounds echo throughout the massive cave. It grows louder and louder, turning into a deafening roar of foamy boil rising from the depths. The timed-out 56k trolls are quickly overcome by it's bubbly inferno. The adventurers look on in terror as the steamy froth rushes towards them. Suddenly it resides and a slender, wavy piece of pasta wiggles from the froth. It droops across the bridge and transforms into...Captain Gabryan II! A shapeshifting pastamancer with an expertise in noodlecraft. "Bonerjamz!" He exclaims, and joins his friends in their quest. Let's Dance erupts through the cave. A blinding flash overcomes everyone. As the adventurers slowly regain their vision, they find themselves standing in WFFF Saloon. Deezy is there, leaning against the wall playing an electric guitar. Albo, mystified, shouts over the booming music "What the hell is this?". "Must be a misplaced post!" Sir Een yells back, "enjoy it before TDC The Enforcer breaks it up!". Albo shrugs his shoulders and joins the group as they burst into a celebratory noodlefest.

(edited)

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

someone please cast an Add Boyd spell...

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

The Trolls, stupified by the sheer insane quanitity and ferocity of attacks, feels time slow to a halt... this halt of time lingers for days, months.... they and all involved are lost in limbo. This limbo becomes an intense meditation....you ALL find yourselves... A peaceful bliss passes over you for months and months...as you slowly watch your spells and flails and febreze reach the trolls dropped jaw in wonderful slow motion. The trolls live in opposite terror, the exact opposite feeling that you adventures feel. Their sensation is a living hell...akin to being sucked into a black hole and feeling their body stretched slowly over time until they experience complete protonic reversal, akin to crossing the streams. They yern for their death, and in that mental prison of time, they have a moment of clarity and for once....just once in their miserable wasted lives as Spartafoxilover trolls feel maybe, just maybe being a troll was a really dumb and pointless thing. But that moment is in vain....

for on October 17 at 4am, the spells make contact, the flail hits, the febreze cleanses, and they shatter in an instant momentary explosion of mucus, troll ooze, and fart jokes, like a fireworks display, like how the deathstar exploded before george lucas fucked it up, like how trolls ought to die.

Everyone is covered in ooze, but nevertheless, had never felt so funky.

You all collect samples... but are quickly made aware of the glowing lights in the distance. "Oh yeah!" one of you cries. the glows get bigger and bigger. They start to look like giant flying bugs... there is a swarm of thousands....all around you all. In the distance is darkness... maybe a gate? maybe a door? Maybe your death?

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

The side effects take a while to wear off. You all stumble around in a daze down the long corridor bridge in the pit of blackness....

The bugs hovering around you are biting and stinging you easily since your daze makes you all easy targets.

You come across a closed door which you all make your way through to get out of the pestering big onslaught. You all lose 3 hit points from the stings.

Upon passing the door you are all extremely confused. This is what you see:

An astral plane of poppy fields.... of flowers stretching forever.

You all do a roll call to see who remains after the 3 months of time standing still, and the bug onslaught. Your party originated with:

Deezy, Spoo, Em, Sir Cliff, Albo, Tracy, Robert, Will, Trevor, Stever, Ryanr, Serene, Gabe. Some are lost in time. Deezy is dead.

When you all figure that out, you travel into the field of poppies...

Popping out of the poppies you encounter 3 giant creatures, each has bronzed skin, frosted razor sharp hair tips (1d6 damage) and towers over you all at 20 feet. You immediately recognize them as 2 Garyflower Undertrolls and a Gary Flowers UberLifanTroll! The UberLifan troll has surprized you adventures in your dazed state and attacked with a Mod spell!

Sir Cliff's legs are now on Spoo's torso, and vice versa. Tracy's ambition is now in Roberts heart. Em's sparkplug flail now uses lifan clutches, Albo switches to windex and trades his literacy with Stever. All is confused.

The Undertrolls are bending over and preparing to do a Frosted Tip charge upon the party. The Uberlifantroll is preparing a spell of some sorts.

How do you proceed?

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

If I might, I wish to emerge from the door behind this wily group and summon a beast to join the fight against the trolls. It is a two-headed Walter Kaaden and Jerry Deuby dragon swinging Lazer mopeds around.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Suddenly the White Wizerd's Xol'Lady who eats bigger trolls than that for berkfast did the same and ate up all the trolls then the gate keeper throws the dice 7 craps your turn !

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Cheif Mycon attacks with two summoned Lazer strikes. One hits an Undertroll for 7 hp of damage. The other Undertroll rolls a successful saving throw and replaces the Lazer with a Lifan engine, rendering it utterly useless.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

well i give up it's clear that you have me beat! if you kids want too play make belive knock your lights out and i promise that i will bother you no more! no chiming in no nothing this is it. so have fun !

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

ummmm, after that, I don't proceed. :)

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

Feeling strangely ambitious, I see no reason to hold back. It is now time to unleash my true power! I remove from my NPR tote bag a small Emerson Mark V transistor radio with hi fidelity mono speaker. Carefully tuning the device I hold it aloft and read an incantation then pledge $100... I Summon Garrison Keillor in an attempt to mollify the Gary Flowers under-trolls with folksiness.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

The trolls are baffledby the sonic folk sincerity to the point where one of their heads explode dripping a rotten wafflehouse aroma, which makes all your hearts ache in the sheer oximoron of wafflehouse and rotten. Moral drops heavily, yet at least there are only two of them left.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

♣Slew Foot♣ /

Nerd bumper. ...

Searched wafflehouse.

Re: Cave Entrance, Simon Mountains

♣Slew Foot♣ /

4 da nerds...

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