MOPED ARMY

It may be a good idea to consult a probate lawyer.

I know moneys tight so try to find local community programs in your area and contact them about pro bono lawyer services.

You'll probably have to pay for at least a consultation but a lawyer will be able to explain what your legally responsible for, how to navigate the VA, and possibly connect you to someone who can help.

First of all, I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss, I too will be a wreck when that time comes... Not sure if you belonged to a church of any kind, they may be able to point you in a direction? I would imagine the VA would be somewhere to start. I have never dealt with a funeral home, but I would imagine they have plans for this, maybe payments? Cremation is cheaper than full on burial...I bet they have a system in place, a lot more people are low on money than well off, not the first time they have heard this. There is an organization called the wounded warrior project...while I think they help with disabled vets, they may be of some help navigating the VA?

Your dad sounded like a really cool guy, the lion story was great! Please accept my condolences for his passing, take one step at a time, breathe, and things will fall into place. The probate lawyer sounds like a good idea if you can find a way. (edited)

Without knowing what religious/social/family expectations weigh on you I'd only venture to beware of any strangers bearing gifts. Funeral home directors, priests and pastors, unsolicited grief councellors, unsolicited financial advisors... 'ambulance chasers' all... For many of them you're just a mark right now.

Simple cremation according with, and fully respectful of, your father's wishes, is available local to you via Web search. A funeral home will charge you 3k to 6k just to walk in their door. Arrange it...paperwork , certificates, and notifications, yourself, for 1k and less hassle than an average tax return. Society, and funeral directors say shame on diy'ing this. Don't listen. Your dad would be proud I think. (edited)

^ What this man said, right now, grief stricken, you are a "mark" it is criminal, but people do what he said, make your own decisions, stop, THINK, take your time. You will come out ok, you are in my thoughts.

My best to you Aaron, you have to eat, take care of yourself, you are no good to anyone weak and fucked up, though I can see a relapse in my future when my parents pass, i'm not putting you down. I'm glad you have a plan. Stick with it. Take care of yourself.

Lol Stephen, I wasn't wasted. I was just in a bad way...fucked up was the wrong words to use.ha

Kinda wanted to smoke some weed though...not stupid enough to do that, I just got a job offer that's in an industrial environment...They don't look at stuff like that in a good way..

Glad you worked it out,Aaron. `Work is the antidote to sorrow',so they say. Glad you're getting work.

yo, i lost my mom in '13. i wasn't ready for it and i was very emotional. the one and only thing that made me feel, well not "better," but put it in perspective.

everyone goes through this. it is your duty as "offspring" to watch your parents die. if you don't outlive your parents, you're in a sense, worthless. descendants must actually descend.

it's hard. take some time. get wasted. scream. cry. but accept it. live more extra good to honor your lost loved ones.

he would never tell us names mit...i know that war was rough, so i never pushed....when he was shot down the second time he was alone in north Vietnam for 4 weeks evading...i know that his pilot lived, but it was never something i felt comfortable asking about...i just listened when he opened up..

he was in the navy and never expected to be on the ground,,,i cant imagine...he had his first heart attack in 88'..the navy reassigned him to a navy hospital until he retired..i cant complain really, he was told he diddnt have much time back then, made it 30 more years until this one got him.

it is amazing the life he lived, even if i was 12 years younger(18) i cant imagine how i could ever catch up with his life experience..he was a private pilot, skydived, captained an ocean going boat, Surfed 50 foot waves, had a harley at 11 years old, dated a mousekateer, cut john wayne's lawn as a kid, lived next door to johnny carson, cleaned jimmy stewarts pool as a teen, spoke fluent mandarin but only while drunk!!, grew up in a cheap house on the bad side of town.....waterfront, Venice beach in Los angeles!

after his first enlistment was up his CO called him into his office and offered him $15,000 as a reenlistment bonus to stay in Vietnam...in 1971! his response ( No sir, Id rather suck donkey dicks on the corner for a nickle apiece than stay in this outfit)...

moved back to la and reinlisted 6 months later...LA was too boring..stayed until 91'

You need to find his military form DD214 and contact the local VA office. They should be able to help you.

i know a person in the same boat...keep it together...& in about a year things will be better...it doesn't happen over night...but step by step...cross off off one more thing every day...don't go into the old photos etc too much, it will slow you down every time...treat it as a job...one more crossed off, every day....