MOPED ARMY

Can be a sign of mental illness, not always, but could be, Manic depression, it's a frustrating mess! ;) One way to stop that shit is to make her pay for things she wants, not out of the house fund if you both don't agree. I feel you, I could die with the way my furniture is right now. ;D Some people are just never happy, I don't know why, in my experience there are more women like this than men, but again just my experience. I pity people like that, they never get to just relax. Consider yourself fortunate that you at least, know contentment, I do too, and it is wonderful.

^ lol, that would definitely help!

Sounds like a woman.

I'm not shure if we're still allowed to say that these days, but yes.

Blame advertising, if you fall for their crap everything is the next new thing, and you needed it yesterday! Only in America will a company tell you you can save money by buying something, people are weak minded, so it works. Doesn't say much for us does it...

It is heavenly. But we can’t afford this sort of luxury. I’ve just accepted being broke my whole life up to now. I have some bigger goals which have made it necessary to squirrel away money in a separate bank account. She knows about it and is happy that I’m doing it? Why she couldn’t just be happy to leave the cash alone in our shared account, is beyond me.

Like I said earlier, most guys I know have frugal wives that save for the future and it’s the dude trying to blow every paycheck on fun stuff. I guess it’s silly to think I’ll change her and I love her regardless.

Thanks for listening to my problems. If anyone has a similar situation and found a way to communicate a solution. I’d be thrilled to know.

My friend, you are in a serious catch 22, you love her, (that's good) but she has fundamental differences from you, that's bad, for you. I have had the joy of being in love twice in my life, with wonderful women, the first one I would prob be married to and still with were we not 7 years apart in age, and just never quite in the same place in life at the same time, a real shame, but very real. Not fair to either of us. The second, also an amazing woman, but kind of like yours, always buying and everything must be new, that is just not me. It makes me sad as if I was rich and did not worry about money I would not care what she did, or bought, but I will never be rich like that, and I see myself as a disappointment to her, and to live with her would cause fighting and ruin "us". It sucks, I'm cool with old and used, and she wants new, it would tear us apart, I do not want to fight if I have a so, I want her on the same page as I. These facts have not diminished my love for her, but it keeps me at a distance, as I don't think I could keep up with her wants. I have lived alone for 19 yrs now, and it would be hard to change, unless I win the lottery, but then how do you know anyone cares for you beyond what you can do for them financially? I'm far from a perfect person, I don't expect perfection out of a woman, but to share my life she has to be on the same page as I, and sadly this dream come true, is not. I would give anything to change that, but who 'am I to tell anyone what they want? Tread lightly my friend, build that garage apt, but sleep next to her every night. My best to you both.

- Turn off router for a week and unplug modem from wall.

- Wife spontaneously combusts, get a new one.

- Plug modem back in, turn on router.

Don,

I appreciate the advise. I don’t know if you caught it, or remembered it, but we used to be heavily involved in church. I was a trustee at a FWB church, right there in southern Ohio.

We grew to an understanding that, while there IS a ton of good philosophy and teaching in the Bible, there’s tons of absolutely wrong made up stuff that cannot be reconciled.

The Bible absolutely demands that women take a subordinate position to men and the old lady and I do not believe that is correct. We think it’s silly to say men and women are equal. They are definitely unique to one another and our differences deserve being noticed and celebrated. We do have the right to be equally respected and that makes any Biblical basis for our relationship not feasible.

Of course, it’s easy to have a peaceful marriage if one partner submits to the other. Some people are perfectly happy being in that position, letting someone lead while they follow. That’s not our jam though.

I’m actually starting a course of study with the end goal of being a clinical psychologist. I have attended different types of counseling and training for counseling. There is much to be learned and improved by studying our mental processes. I’ve seen it for myself and it is more real and productive than anything I encountered in a church. And believe me, I put everything I had into that for 15 years of my life.

We had a very productive day today by learning our “leadership voice” by taking the 5 voices assessment. I am a Guardian/Nurturer and she is a Connector. The stuff was spot on and it will provide us with tools to communicate with each other more effectively and stop clashing on issues. If she loves planning and executing and I love dreaming and designing, it should be possible for me to communicate my goals to her and enlist her natural energy to accomplish my goals as well.

It’s a work in progress.

Nah, don't dump her, you have made it this far. :) It was sad things did not work as I had hoped, but I'm grateful I got to experience what it feels like to care like that. At least trying to force a square peg into a round hole did not make us hate each other. I will never understand some peoples need for new and expensive, anymore than they can understand why I care not a whit for such things.

Fuck off you misogynistic asshole.

Disrespecting God's prophet brought out the she-bear. LOL!

Don,

I’ll put it this way.

For thousands of years, since Jesus died, Christians have been matching the secular culture around them. Always a step behind (so they don’t look as sinful) but doing the same things as everyone else.

Jesus told his followers to forsake everything, trust only in God to provide their needs and go preach the word.

God doesn’t change, the Bible doesn’t change. But, Christians have changed. They look exactly the same as everyone around them. Because NONE of them actually believe in God. They know they have to work normal jobs, they enjoy modern healthcare, they participate in the economy and all the nonsense that the secular world does. Just a slightly different shade.

The Christians of 1000 years ago would stone you to death or burn you at the stake for all your vehicles and mopeds and vacationing in Florida. “How dare you take the Lord’s resources for such extravagant selfish pleasure?”

You aren’t afraid that your aren’t living the exact life that Jesus told you to. Because, deep down inside, you know there is NO consequence to resisting the instructions of the Bible. Because it isn’t real. And NOBODY else is either.

Religion, ALL RELIGION, is just some horrible human coping mechanism for dealing with the anxiety of the unknown and unexplained. The delusions are destructive (historically, not just my opinion) and need to be put in check before it ruins any possibility of a peaceful future.

I’m pretty certain the only reason anyone goes to church is to get them mansions in glory. Walk on the golden streets. It’s pure selfishness at its finest. That’s why church parking lots are full of brand new luxury cars while folks live in squalor around them.

Modern Americans live better than the royalty of Jesus’s time. You’re fooling yourself, hard, if you think anything else. You ARE the rich man trying to fit through the eye of a needle. The hypocrisy is obvious to absolutely everyone except Christians. I’m not just calling you out. But every single person that hasn’t sold everything they have to take up their cross and walk. Trust God to lead them to a hospitable home that will take them in and feed them while they preach to the family and heal their cancer with prayer before walking to the next good work.

Nobody does that. The people that do are considered crazy. Probably because they are.

I care about you. I’m not trying to be mean. Just, step back and assess how very lukewarm everything about Christianity nowadays really is and what that says about the reality of the faith of its believers.

I didn’t want to lie to myself, and the people around me, anymore. You shouldn’t either.